This post is quite personal for me. Sharing my struggles is not something I usually do. But, since we are all struggling with something, I thought I would share what I do when I feel like I am losing control.
We have all had those moments, or days, or weeks, or months or years! The times when you feel hopeless and helpless. You feel as if you are doing everything you can to move forward but no matter what you try, you either continue to feel stuck, and/or things just continue in a downward spiral.
I was inspired to write this post as I feel like I am currently spiraling and losing control, in regards to some health concerns I have been experiencing. Not having answers on top of feeling horrible can make each day feel pretty daunting and scary. When you are feeling down, helpless and as if you are losing control, you have to do something or else you will get emotionally bogged down quite quickly.
I do not have all the answers, but here is my advice for dealing with life when you feel like you are losing control (and some inspirational quotes):
1) Try and turn your thoughts around as much as possible. I often think “what could possibly change that would make tomorrow better”. I find it incredibly easy to have this mindset especially when I am not feeling well and my body is not cooperating with me. I have found it helpful to change this thought, even if only slightly. Now I think “well hey, at least it probably can’t get much worse”. I know that doesn’t sound positive but I have found this small mindset shift to be helpful and a find it helps me feel somewhat in control. It also adds a little humour… more on that in a moment. You are a fighter, so keep fighting!
2) Let your supports in. Sometimes we don’t want to let others know what we are going through. We don’t want to burden others with our problems; I get that, I have this mindset often. Now take a minute, think of someone you really care about. If they were struggling would you want to know? Would you feel that knowing their problem is a burden on your life? Would you be annoyed by their moment of weakness? Personally I wouldn’t, I would want to know, in fact I’d be pretty mad if I didn’t. I am so thankful for my parents and siblings (both natural and those through marriage), grandparents, best friends and co-workers. Most of all I am thankful for my number one supporter, my husband, who has been by my side through all the ups and downs. You don’t have to tell everyone everything, heck you don’t have to tell them anything at all, but if you need them, then let them in. I guarantee you both will be happy you did.
3) Humour is key. I admit, this humour is sometimes slightly twisted and dripping in sarcasm. But hey, if it works, go with it. You have to be able to laugh at yourself and laugh with those in your life. What you are going through can be serious, so don’t add to the pressure, don’t take yourself or others too seriously.
4) Remember you are stronger than you believe. Is this the first time you have faced hardship, disappointment, or defeat? Probably not. Think of all the battles you have fought in your life. Whether you feel like it or not right now, you are strong, you are a fighter, and eventually, things will become more manageable!
5) Stop beating yourself up. Yes we all want to be doing more than we are now. We are frustrated and annoyed and feel like our body or mind is turning on us. Being hard on yourself isn’t going to change the situation and isn’t going to improve your day. So just stop!
6. Continue to be stubborn, don’t give up. It is important to realize that there is a difference between beating yourself up and giving up. You are a fighter, remember?!? Don’t lose that fight, drive, and stubbornness. You have overcome hard times in the past, and you will do so again! I think this quote sums it up perfectly!
7) Look for inspiration. I turn to Pinterest often and look under quotes. You can search for whatever you need, happy, funny, sad, inspirational, motivational or whatever you may need at that moment. Here is my Pinterest Quote Board. Feel free to pin any quotes you see here to your quote board.
8) Have a good cry when you need one! You need to get your emotions out, and sometimes a good cry is exactly what you need! Don’t be afraid to shed a few tears but remember:
9) Move around. Go sit outside or move to a different room in your home if you are unable to get outside. Sometimes a change of scenery is exactly what we need. Now although she is not my favourite artist, it is pretty hard to hear “Shake it Off” and not want to wiggle around to the catchy tune. If you are like me you will be mad at yourself after for liking it, but that’s ok!
10) Use your creativity. Write how you are feeling. Or draw. Or paint. Or sing. Whatever creative activity you enjoy, try it out. It may help you to let go of emotions that you didn’t even realize you had!
11) Finally, remember:
What do you do when you feel like you are losing control? Let me know by commenting below 🙂
First of all I’m so sorry to hear that you’re going through your ailments And I hope you feel better and wish you all the best of luck. Second I can completely relate to you because for my pregnancy with my daughter I was put on bed rest the entire time, because my body does not handle pregnancy well and that’s how we lost our first son, so I know what it’s like to feel like your body is failing you and like you have no control. And then I had a very long recovery. you’ve provided wonderful tips and I hope many take you up on them that are also feeling like their lives are out of Control and thank you for sharing such personal post
Wow thank you for sharing your experience with me! It is definitely hard when we feel we are being betrayed by our own bodies! Thank you so much for stopping by!
Sorry to hear you are going through this. But it’s good to see that you are writing about it. This will help you deal with it better and come out on top! 🙂
Thanks for your kind words Antonio & thanks for visiting 🙂
Some very good points here, particularly that choice when you see yourself acting out of a particular mindset and then working to change it to a more healthy one, it seems crucial to dealing with difficult situations. My therapist would be very impressed with these, we keep coming back to similar ideas pretty frequently! Glad to hear it’s not just me that tends to see the darkly humourous side to things when it’s all going to pot 😉
Yes I think we all need to work very hard to change our mindsets (easier said than done)! What would we have if not for our humour 😛 I hope these ideas help you! Have a great day!
I hope you’re feeling better! I always fight crying but usually a really good cry often helps me a lot!
Hi Alanna! I think we try to fight it for so long (some more successfully than others :P…. I’ve never been very successful in regards to holding the tears in lol) but eventually we have to give in, and that’s ok 🙂 Thanks so much for visiting!
having a good cry is helpful for me.
I agree Channing, it’s such a therapeutic feeling! Thanks so much for stopping by!
Step 2 is always the easiest for me because I am close with my mom, but #8 is very hard! I hate crying.
http://thealwaysblog.com/
I am glad you have a good support! Don’t worry, we won’t tell anyone if you cry 😉 Have a great night and thanks for visiting!
Some very inspiring words that I can relate to! Thanks for sharing. It sounds like you have the mentality to work through anything – with most challenges that is more than half the battle!
Thanks for your kind words Natasha! Thanks for stopping by, I hope to see you again soon 🙂
It takes a lot to talk about how you are feeling and after reading this post, I think you discount how strong and knowledgeable you are!!! Your pointers are spot on – I hope you are feeling better and definitely lean on your support system if anything…we’re all here for you!!
Wow thanks so much for your kind words Dana! I really appreciate that! Thank you for reading 🙂 I hope to see you tomorrow, I think you will find a nice surprise in store at the Link Up Party 😉
Great tips! The anxiety caused from loss of control can feel like the worst.
Yes that can be challenging for sure! Thank you so much for visiting!
I really love the tip of “you are stronger than you believe” — great tips!
Hi Jessica, I think that is a tip that we ALL need to remember more often! Thanks so much for stopping by!
I think we need to be reminded often that we really are going to be ok. Thanks for that reminder. Thank you for sharing at the #AnythingGoes Link Party.
Yes, that can be so hard to remember when we are feeling overwhelmed, great point!
Great post. I hope things work out for you better soon. You have so many good points. The two that stand out for me personally are 1. ‘The plot twist’. I love that. We get so disheartened because life doesn’t go as planed that is a great instant reframe. 2. That it is okay to have a meltdown. Our culture is pretty hung up on having it together all of the time but life just isn’t always like that. I always liked the quote (don’t know who from) that says ‘the harder you fall the higher you bounce’ and there is some truth in that. Thanks for sharing.
Just the inspiration and insight so many of us need! Plus the graphics are awesome and meaningful! I am delighted that you shared your insightful post ‘How to Deal with Life when You Are Losing Control’ with us on the Healthy Happy Green and Natural Party Blog Hop. I’m pinning and sharing.
Wow thank you so much for your kind words Deborah! I love your party!
thank you for sharing your personal journey. I hope you are feeling better soon and thank you for opening yourself up at #AnythingGoes Link UP
Your experience can help others just as well as it can help you. I totally understand where you’re coming from having lived with depression in the past. You should add “Choose Joy” to your list. I think that it helps to make a conscious decision to be joyful. It’s not about happiness and emotion, it’s about choosing to see things differently. Congratulations on being one of our featured #AnythingGoes bloggers this week! And thank you for sharing your heart.
This is one of the best articles I have read in a long time and with my daughter about to have major surgery on Friday for the 16th time in 2 years, its something I needed to read. Hope your health issues improve xxx
Thanks so much for commenting Suzi, I will keep you and your family in my thoughts!
Everyday is a new challenge for me – Living with Anxiety is not easy however having a great support system of those who love me and will be here for me is a plus. Great post! While I’m here I would also like to thank you for linking up on my Motivational Monday linkup last week and I hope that you will stop by again this week as well 🙂 Happy Monday!
Supports are key! Not everyone has great supports but these come in so many forms including online forums, facebook groups and so much more! I am glad you have supports to lean on in difficult moments! Thanks for hosting the link party 🙂
These are all great tips, but numbers two, four, and five, in my opinion, are essential. Living with a chronic illness makes us become isolated and guilty. Letting in others, not giving up, and not beating yourself up can make a big impact.
Yes I agree Brandi! Not beating your self is key! Very hard… but important! Thanks for visiting!
I think it’s amazing that you’ve wrote such a positive post, helping others, while you’re going through such a tough time yourself! Thanks for writing, great words!! #JustAnotherLinky
Wow thank you so much for your kind words Lianne! Thanks for taking the time to come over and read the post 🙂
Thank you for sharing your intimate thoughts. You’re right, we all go through those motions; whether a moment or months at a time. I’m going through a bit of a shift right now and it’s very uncomfortable. It’s important for me to have quiet, uninterrupted time, drink plenty of water, rest, and take breaks from the stressors. I want to incorporate more exercise during this time because it helps mood changes as well.
Hugs…
Love great quotes. We are yes doing the best we can do. Great thoughts shared here, thanks for this, will share.
When I find myself loosing control, I seem to scream into a pillow, break down and just stay in a room by myself.
I really enjoyed reading this post. It’s given me a few good pointers.
Excersise helps me big time.
Thanks so much for linking up with #justanotherlinky hope you can link up again Sunday xx
What great ideas. I love that you included letting your support system in. So often, it’s easy to shut people out when things get tough.
This is a great post that a lot of people can benefit from. In our world where so much is going on I’m sure a lot of people feel like they are losing control. Thanks for the tips.
You found so many amazing quotes for this post! These are all amazing ways to get back control of life. I have always found that getting out and getting some fresh air really can help alot with a little exercise too.
I am sorry that you have to go through this. What you have written here are all true. If you feel like everything is spiraling down, don’t go with the flow. Think positive, laugh about it and think that you’re storing enough to fight it.
Those are all really good tips. As someone who spent years in therapy, they’re pretty much exactly what I was taught to do. I really hope you get answers soon to your health concerns. That can definitely make you feel like you are losing control. Not knowing is the hardest part. I went through that for two years and it can make you feel like you’re going crazy. But you have a really good attitude, so you’ll push through!
Thank you for baring your heart! It’s hard to feel out of control and not be able to cope. I found that therapy was incredibly helpful, but so is humor. I actually yelled “plot twist” today when my boys were fighting and took away the toy.
This is a great post on how to deal with life without losing control. I love all your tips and quotes. I am pinning this for sure! It often times for me feels that bad things happen in sets of three and often time when that happens you can easily spiral. Thanks for this post.
These are great pieces of advice. I find that when I am losing control in one area of my life, I like to exercise more control over the things I can control. I hope that your struggles are brief and that happy days make it back onto your calendar very soon.
A good support system can be so helpful! I honestly don’t know how people do it without help and love from friends and family sometimes.
Yes those individuals must be incredibly strong! Thanks so much for stopping by Robin!
First of all I hope you feel better soon. Secondly, it’s so important to let people in. Our family is there for us in good times AND in bad. If we would be there for them, it’s only fair to allow them to be there for us. That’s what family is all about.
So true Stacie, if we want them to let us in then we have to be willing to do the same! Thanks for visiting and for your kind words!
So sorry to hear that you are going through chronic pain. I totally agree about finding humor in things. Laughter is the best medicine, even though sometimes it’s hard to laugh through the tears.
Yes laughter is key Alli! Thanks for your kind and supportive words!
Ugh. I feel like I’m losing control more often now that my kids are home for the summer. I feel like my house and my kids are in a free for all and no one listens. So now when I get overwhelmed I step back and go hit the heavy bag til I can calm down.
Taking a step back is so key, I am glad you have found a way to cope that works for you! Keep taking those breaks as you need them! Thanks for visiting!
So sorry to hear this. Hope you feel better soon. Don’t get overwhelmed and try to relax. Everything will be alright in His time.
Thanks for stopping by and for your kind words!
These are all inspiring quotes. So sorry for your pain, I admire that you still have the positive outlook despite your sufferings.
Thanks for your kind words 🙂 Glad you enjoyed the quotes!
Nice post for anyone, really, who feels like they have more than they can handle.
“You are stronger than you believe” is so true! I always put myself down and always think I will fail. Thanks for so many reminders :]
So sorry to hear about what you’re going through. I love number 4! You have to believe that you are stronger than you think you are and you will succeed.
When I feel like I’m losing control…I pray. I also agree with humor yourself. Laughter is the medicine after all.
Thats right! The first thing anyone can do for themselves is to just get up and keep trucking, the world wont stop for you so don’t stop for anything unless you are trying to smell the roses.
These are all great tips. The one I struggle with the most is beating myself up. It’s hard for me to let things go.
Thanks for visiting Cherri, the fact that you are aware of your challenges makes you that much more able to deal with the issue when it comes up! Be kind to yourself!
These are great tips, easier said then done when you’re in the midst of something. I’ve always worried about things out of my control. I had to constantly work had to STOP. Some of these tips are what help me.
I agree, everything is much clearer in hindsight! In the moment it can be hard to remember these things and think rationally, I think this is something many of us constantly work at! Thanks so much for visiting!
These are wonderful tips! Sometimes life is hard and we need to try and stay as positive as we can.
I agree Carly! Thanks so much for visiting 🙂
These are awesome quotes and ideas when you feel you are losing control. I love the last quote the most. The things you have stated here are things I usually think of when I am starting to lose control. They do really work. Thanks for sharing.
That quote is one of my favourites as well! Thanks so much for visiting Rebecca!
I suffer from chronic pain and it often leads me down the depression road. It’s a cycle that I sometimes wish that I could get off on. I do take meds for depression, my pain is far worse when I don’t take it.
Remember it’s okay to take depression meds if it helps you. I know that there is such a huge stigma there.
I also have learned to ask for help, take things slowly, and a bit of sunshine does me wonders. I don’t realize that lack of sunshine can be depressing until I’m outside for a while.
Humor is important. I know that things can feel so busy and crazy at times. It’s important to take breaks.
These are all great tips. Especially humor. I know when I feel myself start to spiral, I try to channel my humor!
I’ve been having an out of control couple of months, this post is very helpful!
Thank you. I think I really need to read that today. Love the quotes throughout as well.
Very appropriate for today as I try to figure out if I need to plan to spend several grand on having a new well drilled for our house and my wife struggles with health problems. Plot Twist, indeed.
I hope you’re feeling better now. Thanks for these awesome tips.
So, you’re a fighter. I’m one too. Stay in the ring but don’t forget to go to your corner when u hear the bell so you can get ur cut mans pep talk! That’s what I do…am doing a lot lately. I’m mentally ill and alone..have been all my 44 yrs. That being said…what I do? It’s weird. I don’t have friends or family. I have me. So, me gives myself a talking to! Which is basically reiterating the things my dad would yell at me or sternly say. “You’re not quitting. Cuz you aren’t a quitter!” “Nobody is going to take care of you but you so you better get started!” “Don’t give me that bullshit!” “You don’t act like that in public…EVER!” “You don’t have a choice!” I’m not going to praise you. I expect that from you!” And I say my favorite quote I’ve lived by for so so long. “Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway.” John Wayne. I sing certain songs…help, Here comes the sun, In my life by the beetles, I am rock by Simon and Garfunkel, Here I go again by Whitesnake and Hey lilappleblossom by White Stripes. And always! Always! Laugh at my pain or at least grimace. Finally, repeat what my dad has said to me for years. “You can’t win for losing!” Oh ya, I also say, “FUCK IT! JUST FUCK IT!!” That’s been keeping me alive and moving for more years than I want to say. I hope you feel better soon. Keep bobbing and weaving!! Best Wishes!!